19When the 1 is the parent
As a parent, a 1 sets the standard and expects it met: encouraging when you try, impatient when you do not. Children of a 1 learn independence early and need to hear that they are loved for who they are, not what they achieve.
As a child, a 9 is old for their age, generous and easily wounded by unfairness. They need to be heard, and to see that the world is not all theirs to fix.